1.12.2005
I'm the only one
Who'll walk across the fire for you
I'm the only one
Who'll drown in my desire for you
It's only fear that makes you run
The demons that you're hiding from
When all your promises are gone
I'm the only one
ahh something is wrong with me. i am like.. going insane.. literally. and its driving me insane. gosh. like, i can't stop correcting peopls grammer. wtf? sicne when do i are how other people talk? and i noticed that i'm like.. controllling other people. telling them what to do and what not to do. slap me. .please. i know what i do it. but like, i dont think about it until its way to late and the other person is probably thinking "wow she's such a bitch." ahhhh. and like, i cant concentrate at alllll. and i cant memorize anything. i have 2 spanish tests tomorrow. i don't even know what they're on. wtf. ahhh i dono what to do. gosh. i just want to fall asleep for a long long itme and wake up and be ten years older, done with high school, done with college, and have a high paying job, a family, no kids please (too stressful) and be relativley popular, have people know my name who i dont know. thats all i'm asking. is it too much?
i'll update later
no wait.. i'm updating right now. why not just finish the job now? ahhh INDECISION IS KICKING IN. kicking me in butt is more like it. gosh.
ok. so, track has been going good. hit my leg on the hurtle yesterday. woke up this morning and my leg hurt like hell. the one i hit that is. and yesterday i also failed a math quiz. probably. as well as everyone in the class. mrs.manos was being a bit of a bitch,practuically calling us all stupid. she wa slike "we've been studying this, its not like you've never seen the materail before, youve known about this quiz, you have a notecard and you could have written anythin on it, i dont know why you are are having so much trouble, the questions are easy, they are simple, i didnt put hard questions on here, if youre not getting this then theres something wrong, this is an honors calss" i mean.. she couldnt have made me feel more like i could cry. like, i was really holding back tears in her clas, especially when i went to hand it to her and shes like "i cant accept work like this, you're not finished left, there are all these problems (points at 3 (out of 10) problems)that you havent even tried." havent even tried/ excuse me? do you see all those earase marks? i dont know what the hell im supposed to do, thats why there not done. duh. i'd do them if i could/ its notliek i'm TRYING to fail her class. and anna cornachio made a good point. way to go! (not sarcasm) i really really apreacite her sticking up for us all saying TO HER FACE "we're trying to do good, but we just dont understand it as well as you think we do, i personally think these are really hard (i agree) and if we're not getting it then we should spend some time going over everything, cuz we just dont get the materail, instead of rushing off trying to finish a bunch of stuff." THANK YOU. thats what i felt like saying, but passive me, i sat there and listened. coloring on the back of my test. take that mrs.manos. shows how much i care. i care about my grade. i dont care for a test that has materail we dont understand on it. at all. blah. whatever. im just.. mad. i dono, somethigns wrong with me.
bes back! yes she is! and shes feeling better. she wasnt a track today though. oh well. tomorrow maybe?
saturday is the semi formal. i dont knwo why im not as excited as i usually am before a dance. im usually like, out of my mind extatic, but this tiem its like "blah, do i have to go?" but yes. i do have to. i wanted too. maybe like, on sturday morning i'll get realyl rexcited. but then again.. ten dollars for a ticket? wth? i dont have any money. and yet i hav eto pay my dues. and pay for my track jacket (YESSSSSS IM SO EXCITED!!! (NOT SARCASM)) and blah. i have no money. well, actually thats not true. i have 300 dollars. cept im pretending i dont cuz i dont want to spend it. any of it. its going to my car. well, my future car. a ford thunderbird or a nissan xterra. blue thunderbird. idonowhatcolor xterra. yup yup. thats the plan. but im never gonna be able to afford one if i spend my money!. watever. ill just get a job. which i want really bad but have no time for. working. earning money. those word stimulate the "ka ching" sound in my head every time they;re said.
oh yeah, that song at the beginning.. one of my favorites. melissa ethridge. i think thats how you spell her last name. off her cd "yes i am melissa." well, as if that could get any more straight foward. how bout "yes i am rachel." yes, rachel is I. hmm...
anyway i have homework and i want to watch the beatles movie again. its called "The Beatles, The First U.S. Visit. veerrrry cool. i've already seen it, but its good so i wanna watch it again.
bye now!
with insanity, a love for the beatles, an insane math teacher, and a hurting leg,
rachel <3<3
I'm the only one
Who'll drown in my desire for you
It's only fear that makes you run
The demons that you're hiding from
When all your promises are gone
I'm the only one
ahh something is wrong with me. i am like.. going insane.. literally. and its driving me insane. gosh. like, i can't stop correcting peopls grammer. wtf? sicne when do i are how other people talk? and i noticed that i'm like.. controllling other people. telling them what to do and what not to do. slap me. .please. i know what i do it. but like, i dont think about it until its way to late and the other person is probably thinking "wow she's such a bitch." ahhhh. and like, i cant concentrate at alllll. and i cant memorize anything. i have 2 spanish tests tomorrow. i don't even know what they're on. wtf. ahhh i dono what to do. gosh. i just want to fall asleep for a long long itme and wake up and be ten years older, done with high school, done with college, and have a high paying job, a family, no kids please (too stressful) and be relativley popular, have people know my name who i dont know. thats all i'm asking. is it too much?
i'll update later
no wait.. i'm updating right now. why not just finish the job now? ahhh INDECISION IS KICKING IN. kicking me in butt is more like it. gosh.
ok. so, track has been going good. hit my leg on the hurtle yesterday. woke up this morning and my leg hurt like hell. the one i hit that is. and yesterday i also failed a math quiz. probably. as well as everyone in the class. mrs.manos was being a bit of a bitch,practuically calling us all stupid. she wa slike "we've been studying this, its not like you've never seen the materail before, youve known about this quiz, you have a notecard and you could have written anythin on it, i dont know why you are are having so much trouble, the questions are easy, they are simple, i didnt put hard questions on here, if youre not getting this then theres something wrong, this is an honors calss" i mean.. she couldnt have made me feel more like i could cry. like, i was really holding back tears in her clas, especially when i went to hand it to her and shes like "i cant accept work like this, you're not finished left, there are all these problems (points at 3 (out of 10) problems)that you havent even tried." havent even tried/ excuse me? do you see all those earase marks? i dont know what the hell im supposed to do, thats why there not done. duh. i'd do them if i could/ its notliek i'm TRYING to fail her class. and anna cornachio made a good point. way to go! (not sarcasm) i really really apreacite her sticking up for us all saying TO HER FACE "we're trying to do good, but we just dont understand it as well as you think we do, i personally think these are really hard (i agree) and if we're not getting it then we should spend some time going over everything, cuz we just dont get the materail, instead of rushing off trying to finish a bunch of stuff." THANK YOU. thats what i felt like saying, but passive me, i sat there and listened. coloring on the back of my test. take that mrs.manos. shows how much i care. i care about my grade. i dont care for a test that has materail we dont understand on it. at all. blah. whatever. im just.. mad. i dono, somethigns wrong with me.
bes back! yes she is! and shes feeling better. she wasnt a track today though. oh well. tomorrow maybe?
saturday is the semi formal. i dont knwo why im not as excited as i usually am before a dance. im usually like, out of my mind extatic, but this tiem its like "blah, do i have to go?" but yes. i do have to. i wanted too. maybe like, on sturday morning i'll get realyl rexcited. but then again.. ten dollars for a ticket? wth? i dont have any money. and yet i hav eto pay my dues. and pay for my track jacket (YESSSSSS IM SO EXCITED!!! (NOT SARCASM)) and blah. i have no money. well, actually thats not true. i have 300 dollars. cept im pretending i dont cuz i dont want to spend it. any of it. its going to my car. well, my future car. a ford thunderbird or a nissan xterra. blue thunderbird. idonowhatcolor xterra. yup yup. thats the plan. but im never gonna be able to afford one if i spend my money!. watever. ill just get a job. which i want really bad but have no time for. working. earning money. those word stimulate the "ka ching" sound in my head every time they;re said.
oh yeah, that song at the beginning.. one of my favorites. melissa ethridge. i think thats how you spell her last name. off her cd "yes i am melissa." well, as if that could get any more straight foward. how bout "yes i am rachel." yes, rachel is I. hmm...
anyway i have homework and i want to watch the beatles movie again. its called "The Beatles, The First U.S. Visit. veerrrry cool. i've already seen it, but its good so i wanna watch it again.
bye now!
with insanity, a love for the beatles, an insane math teacher, and a hurting leg,
rachel <3<3
// posted by RACH @ 12:59 AM 
